


'Tis The Season

by EezoDistraction



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Christmas Fluff, M/M, Normandy-SR2, Unauthorized use of headgear, extensive fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-16 09:28:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13051224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EezoDistraction/pseuds/EezoDistraction
Summary: Shepard isn't that into Christmas.  Maybe his biotic boyfriend can help with that.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just a couple of short stories for the holidays.

Shepard returns to the Normandy from his meeting with Miranda Lawson on the Presidium in a pretty good mood. She's on the hunt for her sister but is otherwise in good spirits. She's still wearing the same uniform that she was during the battle with the collectors.  Dress smartly and be deadly, a winning combination. The majority of the Normandy crew are on shore leave, so this his chance to maybe catch up on some reports, or even catch a few winks rest.  Kaidan mentioned that he needed to pick up some supplies, but that he wouldn't be long.  As Shepard walks through the CIC towards the elevator, it is quiet with just the skeleton crew aboard.  An unexpected sight greets him as the door to his cabin slides open.

"What the........"

In the cabin sits Kaidan. He's on the floor in front of the bed surrounded by all sort of containers, several drinking glasses, some half full of some off-white colored liquid, others empty but dirty having been drained of the same liquid, an assortment of spoons, packages of foodstuff, some of which appears to have spilled on the floor, and a half-empty bottle of rum. Kaidan is wearing his standard issue BDU pants, socks, but is naked from the waist-up except for a Santa hat on his head.

"Oh ...HEY, Shepard. I uh, yeah, I was going to clean this before, ... before you got back, but you got back now."

"What going on Kaidan?"

"Eggnog! I was going to make us some eggnog and surprise you, but there's no eggs John.  I checked everywhere.  Garrus said he had some powdered dextro-egg thing, but that doesn't work so well for us, .... I guess.  EDI suggested I try powdered flax seed, and that worked really well, but it kinda tastes like ass, and not the good kind of ass, so I had to mix some other things with it to improve the taste."

Shepard tries really hard not to break a smile or laugh, but it gets harder by the second. "Are you drunk Kaidan?"

"No no! I'm good. Just a little tipsy... maybe. I had to test a bunch of sample batches, you know, to make sure it taste just right."

"Half that bottle of rum is gone."

"Yeah. .... oh. But it worked John. It took about six tries, but the last batch tastes really good."

"I'll bet."

"S'okay. I saved you some."

"So, Kaidan..."

"Yeah?"

"Why are you not wearing a shirt?"

"I WAS wearing a shirt. Ok, not a shirt. I was wearing your N7 hoodie, and I kinda spilled some eggnog on it at one point. Oh geez, I'm so sorry about that, but I took it off right away and rinsed it off in the bathroom sink, and it should be ok."

"And you weren't wearing anything else under the hoodie?"

"No. I like it on my bare skin John. It feels like you're giving me a warm hug even when you're not here, and you were not here, so...oh.. I shouldn't tell you that part. Oh shit. Now, you'll think I am weird."

Shepard couldn't help but break a big smile at this point as he walks towards Kaidan and sits down beside him as best he can amongst the mess. "I don't think you're weird. I think you're adorable.  But why did you go through all this trouble to make eggnog?  You know I'm not that big on Christmas things."

"I know John. I thought about it. Thought about it a lot. I have all these wonderful memories of Christmas. Happy times with family and presents, and lights, and food, and you had none of that growing up, and it made me sad. Sad that you never got to experience any of that, so I wanted to share a little something of those happy memories with you. "

Just when Shepard thinks he couldn't possibly love this man any more than he already does, Kaidan proves him wrong. Even with all the destruction and death and despair the Normandy crew experiences on a daily basis, Kaidan hangs on to his humanity practically unscathed.

"That Santa hat looks kinda cute on you" Shepard says as he brushes aside some of the black curls sticking out the front of the hat.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. If I knew Santa could be this sexy, maybe I would have liked Christmas more back then."

Kaidan blushes from embarassment but quickly regains his composure. "Here, try the eggnong" Kaidan says as he pours some in a glass and hands it to Shepard.

"Mmm, this IS pretty good!"

"Told ya. I've got skills."

 "Thanks Kaidan,... for everything."  Shepard leans in and gives him a kiss. He tastes of rum and vanilla.

Kaidan smiles. "See, worth the mess.  I guess I better clean this up." Kaidan starts to stand up, but almost falls over in his drunken state.

"Woah there, Santa" Shepard says as he catches Kaidan before he can fall and leads him to the edge of the bed. "You better sit on the bed here. I'll go get you some water."

"I don't need water! I got... I got eggnog."

"You'll thank me later" Shepard shouts from the bathroom as he fills a glass in the sink. His N7 hoodie sits next to the sink.  "Besides, I think you've had enough eggnog for today."  He makes his way back to the bed, hands Kaidan the water, and sits next to him on the bed.

Kaidan chugs the water and then leans his head on Shepard's shoulder. "Sorry 'bout the mess. I'll help you clean it once ... once the room stops moving around so much _."_

Shepard smiles, puts his arm around Kaidan and squeezes him a little closer. "I think Santa Kaidan has done his part to spread cheer. Let the elves take care of the mess." He gives Kaidan a kiss on the cheek.

"We don't have any elves, Shepard... unless" Kaidan starts to laugh.

"Unless what?"

"I was just picturing Garrus in an elf uniform."

Shepard laughs. "Maybe if we gave him enough eggnog. "

Kaidan giggles as he leans back on the bed. "I better lie down. The rum is making me fuzzy."

"Good idea. We don't want cute Santa to get a hangover."  Shepard pulls a blanket over Kaidan.

"Mmm" Kaidan mumbles, barely over a whisper, as he scrunches himself up under the blanket.  "Best Christmas ever."

"That it is" Shepard whispers back.


	2. Chapter 2

Shepard is in the QEC room discussing the state of the war effort with Admiral Hackett.

... "What about the rachni?"

"I wouldn't have believed it, but the rachni are helping us build the cruicible."

"You're kidding."

"Turns out they have a knack for weapons of mass destruction. In hindsight, I guess they'd know a thing or two about waging a galactic war."

"No problems with them then?"

"Other than scaring the hell out of our engineers, no. Not a lot of small talk going on there."

"Nothing more, sir."

"Keep me posted. Hackett out."

Shepard walks out of the room and into the war room, and turns to his right where Legion is standing next to a terminal.

"Legion, I...."

"Shepard-Commander."

"Legion, ...you have a pair of fuzzy reindeer antlers on your head."

"Rangifer tarandus auxillary skull projections."

"Rangi-fuzzy antlers. Yeah, those things.  What are they doing there?"

"Analysis of Homo Sapiens cultural database indicates similar objects were used to create a mass effect-like field to assist in the delivery of multiple payloads over a short time period, once per solar cycle."

"You mean the reindeer that pulled Santa's sleigh?"

"Correct, Shepard-Commander.   If this technology was available centuries ago, why did the Santa unit not share this technology with others of your species? "

"Well, it's complicated. Let's just say we haven't reached a consensus whether the Santa unit actually exists.  It was probably just wishful thinking."

"They had a conceptual framework but lacked the technological expertise to build it. Thank you Shepard-Commander. I will add this additional information to our analysis. "

"So, where did you get the antlers?"

"Unknown. They just appeared."

"Someone must have put them there. Any ideas?"

Legion moves his faceplates in a contemplative manner. "No data available?"

"EDI?"

"Yes, Commander" EDI says over the comm system.

"Please review the ship logs for the past 24 hours and advise if any crew member had a physical interaction with Legion."

"Working. I'm sorry Commander but that information appears to have been scrubbed from the logs."

"Scrubbed? Seriously?!  That would require some serious hacking skills.  Thank you EDI."

"There are only two people on board this ship with those kind of hacking skills. Tali? Anything you'd like to tell me?"

"Shepard! I never even heard of those fuzzy head things until just a couple of minutes ago.  It does look kind of cute though.  Maybe I should bring some back to the Quarian fleet."

"You may have our copy, Creator-Tali" Legion says. "We have completed our analysis of them."

"Kaidan. That leaves you.  Did you put the antlers on Legion?"

"I'm sorry Commander, but I just got out of medbay about 10 minutes ago. I was laid up for the past twelve hours with a migrane. I didn't move from that spot.  Doctor's orders."

"Doctor's orders, huh? I suppose Chakwas was monitoring you the whole time."

"Oh yes. She's very thorough."

"Then how do you explain the antlers?"

"I don't know, Shepard. Maybe Santa Claus really does exist."

Shepard glares at Kaidan, whose face remains unmoved. Maybe it is the lighting in the war room, but he could swear there is a glint in Kaidan's eyes and the tiniest of hint of a smile that crosses his lips.


End file.
